There is a precursor to this. Seven years ago or so we had a big fight and my husband made a Facebook post and shared with all our family and friends. We are now Five years married and almost Ten together. I still have Facebook’s post printed and saved: it’s “231 Things That I love about you, Elina”. And I was speechless when I read it, tears were pouring. He did it not to show off his love or be a typical millennial. The fight was about his communication skills and this was his way of showing that he could do anything for me. It was sweet and romantic.
This is the reason for this post. I consider myself a writer maybe not a good one, but still a writer. But I never took the time to write a love letter to my husband. This will be the perfect time and the perfect way to do it. Here it goes… (deep breath)
I always considered you my white knight you know. A white knight on a white horse. I used to describe you like that to anyone who would listen to me when we first met. You were and still are the purest, honest and handsome person I know. In this very complicated world that’s filled with misery and dishonesty, you are a gem that I stumbled upon. The very first time I looked into your blue eyes I knew it, I knew with my whole being that even if we wouldn’t make it romantically I would want you as my best friend.
There were times in our relationship that were very rocky and I felt like my world was crumbling. Yet still, you were there holding on to us, to me, trying to work it out trying to resolve whatever was in our way. Even when it meant venturing outside your comfort zone even when it meant talking about stuff nobody wants to talk about.
I’m a neurotic human being, that lives her feelings. I’m feelings first then thoughts and you never threw that into my face not once. I’m constantly worried about everything and you lovely reassure me each and every time. You also never point that out and that’s one of the reasons I love you so much.
There is an effortlessness about you. It’s like everyone struggles to be an adult, find there way, find their ‘style’, struggling to be themselves in each and every interaction with others. And you just are who you are. You don’t care about labels, but you do care about people. You see the person first, then their life and who they are labeled to be. This is the reason why when you talk to people they feel heard and seen almost instantly.
Then there were three. When our son was born, I had a very very difficult time adjusting to being a mom. And you were there for all of it from birth to each and every difficult moment after. Never letting go always supporting and being a wonderful father. I know it must have been difficult for you too, yet you never complained about it.
Yes, you are a human being and not just a beautiful figment of my imagination and that means that you have your flaws. But they only make you more interesting, they give depth and bring out the beauty in you.
I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know this: in a very unstable world where everything changes constantly I found you, a person that I can always count on. You learned me how to love unconditionally and you showed me what unconditional love is. Our relationship is far from perfect, but we don’t need that. As long as we are willing to work it out, everything will be alright.
Oh, and did I mention that I love you? I love you, I love you, I love you!
From Elina to Dmitri